Be Still and Know

Our beautiful St. Paul Cathedral

Tomorrow is Ash Wednesday. I feel unprepared; I have not even stopped for a breath to think about what God wants from me this Lent. The farther I have gotten from pregnancy (now over a year!), the more energy I have and the more focus I am able to put on running a household. I am slowly creating organizational systems that make doing chores easier and more consistent, and while it's still an uphill battle, most mornings I can come downstairs and look around without cringing.

But I don't sit down as often anymore. I don't take those breaks during the day that used to be physically required ("I literally cannot stand up another minute!"), and I choose to do dishes instead of resting. Don't get me wrong, it is good to have energy. I love feeling great, and I love that I am able to care for my kids and keep house without feeling overwhelmed (usually). But I've realized that it was those times of rest that I usually used to reflect, pray, check up with God on my progress for the day... and those moments have become few and far between.

I have also started to multitask all the times that would naturally lend themselves to quiet reflection. I listen to the radio while I clean the kitchen, I read while I eat breakfast... I plan blog posts in the shower. In short, my prayer life has taken a major back seat to just about everything as my physical health and mental focus have returned.

For Lent, I need to remember to step back from the noise and the action and remember to spend time being still and quiet. I've learned that it's pretty hard to hear God if I'm not listening.

Our book club will be reading The Interior Castle by St. Teresa of Avila, which will be a major kick in the pants. Plus I am following an Ignatian Spirituality blog recommended to me by a friend that leads its readers through the Spiritual Exercises throughout Lent. But most of all, for the next forty days, I need to make a concerted effort to reduce the noise that is coming into my life. Then I believe God will really be able to speak to me through St. Teresa and St. Ignatius.

Here's praying for a fruitful Lenten season!