Habits

There's a cool t-shirt that I've seen around with the slogan "Not all habits are bad", in reference to the habits worn by religious sisters. Today I was thinking about the difference between good and bad habits. Have you noticed that we talk all the time about "falling into" bad habits, but it's more of an uphill climb to create the good ones?

We've been trying for almost a year to get Max to stop using his bottle at naptime and bedtime, but every time we get close, something seems to happen that throws him back into his old habit. Last time we really cracked down, we were SO close... and then he got a fever... and then he threw up...and then he got a cold... and then I got a cold... and all of the hard work went down the drain. We are trying again, this time with a positive reward system. For each nap or night that he doesn't use his bottle, he gets a sticker. When he gets 10 stickers, he'll get an awesome reward!

The first time I tried it, he thought about it for a minute and decided he still wanted his bottle. But the next day for his nap, he went to sleep without his bottle! When he woke up, I made a big deal about the sticker we were putting on his chart, and he was very proud. That night, as he was going to bed, he asked for his bottle. I said, "Do you want your bottle, or do you want a sticker in the morning?" He decided on a sticker! Praise the Lord! Oh, but wait. Three minutes later, a very sad Max wandered into the computer room with his paci and Fox in Sox stuffed animal. "Snuggle with Mommy!" he said. So I went to lie down with him for a minute, and as I was leaving, he repeated his request for a bottle. Again, I asked, "Do you want your bottle, or a really cool sticker?" Again, he wanted the sticker! So I left, but I had barely shut the door when he was standing there with a forlorn look on his face. I laid him down one more time and asked him if he still wanted a sticker in the morning. This time he was quiet for a minute, deep in thought. Finally he said, "Want my bottle." The look on his face was heartbreaking, as if I had just asked him to choose whether he loved Mommy or Daddy more.

The next day, when nap time came around, there was no deliberation. He had made the hard decision last night and the time for inner debate was over.

"I want my bottle"

And so it had been every night since then. So much for my genius sticker idea.